Think public hearings aren't sexy? Come to Lebanon

Remember a few years ago when we as Lebanon residents had to learn about what a Special Amusement permit was really all about?

Remember the giggles as we read through it, and the, dare I say, colorful language with which it was peppered.

I mean with all that talk about pelvic exposure and perineum, I mean, phew, it was enough to make a sailor, even a Lebanon selectman, blush.

I daresay hardly appropriate talk at a public hearing of God-fearing folk.

Well hold on to your knickers! Here we go again.

Tomorrow night at 6 p.m. at LES we have to get up close and personal and learn all about studs, yeah studs.

As in interior nonbearing wall partition studs, for gosh sakes.

Only in Lebanon.

Here's the question as it appears on the November ballot.

Shall the Town of Lebanon vote to amend the Building Code Ordinance, Section 5 to read: Nonbearing Partitions: Studs in interior nonbearing wall partitions shall not be spaced more than 16 inches. This applies to interior walls only."?

Is it getting warm in here?

But seriously, first off I can barely hammer a nail. Now I have to become knowledgeable in the "inside baseball" stud world of construction.

I wouldn't know the difference between a load bearing wall and a nonload bearing wall if it fell on me.

Or even if it didn't.

But I guess now I'll have to learn in order to make an informed decision on Nov. 3, and better, yet, so I can ask an astoundingly cogent and compelling question tomorrow night.

Like, "Now when you refer to partitions, are you referring to partitions that are load bearing or, you know, just sit there?"

Or, "Now is that 16 inches spaced from center out or corner in?" (I don't even know what that means, it just sounds good.)

But Lebanon people are a resilient crew. We got through perineum, and we'll get through this, too.

Just wear your carpenter hat.